what kind of idiot do you have to be to tell the truth when you’re a juror and they ask you if you are gonna be biased against the defendant. 47 people were turned away from the Weinstein case because they couldn’t be “objective” like. I’d just lie. I’d just say “I don’t even know who that is” and then I’d send him to prison so fucking hard. or like with Martin shkreli. Just lie. Lie to the state, it’s not that hard.
people say the Magnus Archives isn’t funny but then what do you call the bit in “First Hunt” when an old man tells a harrowing story of his friend being murdered by a werewolf that proceeded to hunt the old man for sport for hours only for Jon to say “that’s nice but it happened in America so that’s really not my problem, is it?”
and what do you call the end of “Blood Bag” when, after hearing about a man dying on the spot after being set up by a swarm of innumerable paranormal mosquitoes, Jonathan’s entire response is “personally I hate mosquitoes and cannot believe this idiot was trying to deal with them nonlethally. 0 sympathy from me sir.”
