i had a dream last night that strexcorp offered to give me a full four year scholarship to any college i wanted if i worked for them and went to night vale and killed carlos and i was just like “alright.” and anyway the short version of what happened next is that i am literally the worst night vale fan ever
i should also point out that i justified this to myself by going “i will use this scholarship to major in cosmology. therefore i am doing this for science and math. so it’s okay.”
and on the bright side: it says a lot about the state of strexcorp that the hitman they hired was a scrawny asthmatic girl.