hollis (they/them) currently studying classics and archaeology.
pompey magnus was the funniest bitch in rome we’ve learned about so far
- just fucking decides that he deserves a triumph for killing marius’ supporters despite meeting absolutely none of the requirements.
- bullies the senate into giving him another. ends up with three. still never met the requirements.
- him and crassus deal w/ spartacus’ rebellion. crassus defeats spartacus’ actual army while pompey defeats other supporters. claims all of the glory b/c he makes it back to rome first.
- is actually really successful military-wise but is a huge bastard about it the whole time
- has his friend in the senate essentially give him dictorial power in order to deal with the pirates.
- ends up with command over the mediterranean and 50 miles inland. this is most of the existing empire.
- is surprisingly not that much of a bastard about it.
- just fuckin bullies the senate into letting him be consul despite never holding the previous required offices and being too young
- this is compromised by being co-consul w/ crassus.
- flees to egypt because he’s in a civil war w/ caesar. gets his head chopped off before he even makes it to shore.
his entire early career is him telling the senate to do something and being told “no.” he asks the senate what they’re gonna do to stop him to which they reply “oh, good point. absolutely nothing. here you go!”